Chapter 5: Affliction and Humility

April 2, 2025

Hello friends and family... I'll just get right to the point. I got called in to talk to my branch president yesterday. I haven't been very honest about this, but the cat's already out of the bag so I don't have much of a choice.

They said I've broken too many of the rules here at the MTC. I won't go into depth about it, but they've given me tons of warnings. I just kept pushing it. So much so that they said that they're going to postpone my mission until I am fully ready for service. They gave me this P-day to pack my belongings. 

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SIKE!!!! APRIL FOOL'S!!! 😆  I know it's April 2nd but today's my P-day so I thought I could get away with it. Did I get you?

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📆 Weeks in the mission: 6 📸 Photos: https://photos.app.goo.gl/ovzFnHjDfDHL45YE9

💬 Quote of the week: "I was hablar-ing with my compañero!" —Elder Mandaba

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Week 5 here at the MTC. Honestly, it has been filled with affliction and discouragement. The personal weaknesses I have been forced to face have brought a huge weight upon my shoulders. I keep trying to forget about it, get to work and move on, but I cannot manage to do it. It has brought me to the depths of humility. Honestly, I thought I would be doing way better as a missionary. That I wouldn't be facing the challenges I am right now. And that's humbling.

This is something I must rely on the Lord for with help. To move forward, I'll need His help.

That being said, I still would never take it back. I know why I'm here. I know my purpose. 

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🌍 Reassignment News:  Oh yeah, got some rather big news! I have been reassigned for a time because I haven't gotten my visa in time for Mexico. So they're sending me to the North Dakota Bismarck Mission until I am cleared to go to Mexico! I'm actually very excited for it! I've never been to North Dakota. It'll be a whole different world.

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📅 Daily Events

Wednesday, March 26  A very productive day. I remembered a lot of my purpose as a missionary. I had the opportunity to do temple sealing for the first time in my life. It surprised me how simple the ordinance was. I want to do more in-depth studying on the new and everlasting covenant. On the way back from the temple, me and few of the elders got together and had a really cool jam powerful.

Thursday  Today was great! It was an unusual schedule, but I loved it. The new district for our branch arrived yesterday. We got to meet them and introduced ourselves and made them feel more welcome. It's strange being the old missionaries, welcoming the new ones. It flew by in an instant.

Friday  Today consisted of more classes, studies, meals, the usual. We held a productive companion study, which was nice. And I commenced my full-immersion studies today. I'll be studying just in Spanish from now on. Luckily I've already had tons of experience speaking Spanish, so I'll be just fine. We had an HOA appointment today as a companionship. This time, I literally sat and looked at Elder Stout and Elder Larsen. They struggled in it a lot, but we saw progress!

Saturday  I'm just going to go right to bed. I'm very tired. Difficult day, and discouragement. 

Sunday  OK, still feeling discouraged. I feel some tension in the companionship. Trios can be hard. Come on! I just want to lift my head, have a positive attitude! Yet it feels so hard to do that! Oh, also, for the Sunday devotional this evening, we had an entire orchestra come to perform a whole 2-hour show. They told us not to record it, but I did anyway and now I have some more music options to listen to for study.

Monday  Still rough. Discouragement. My heart feels closed. I can barely get through the day. What happened to my strength? Today we started SYL, which is literally just speaking in Spanish for the whole week. All the time. Outside of class. It's just fine for me, but it's a lot harder for the others.

Tuesday  Today was another rough day. I received some disheartening news. My branch president shared with me some helpful things, and he helped me feel better. He showed me Mosiah 24. About people in their afflictions. Moving forward, I want to start being grateful again. To count my blessings. In fact, I'll do it every morning and night. It may not be much, but it's the small things that count.

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☀️ Spiritual Thought ☀️ I wrote this down in my journal last Wednesday. It's about Hebrews 11. I want to share what I learned.

"Who do I want to be as a missionary? I want to have faith like the prophets. Ammon. Nephi. Abraham. Moses. Mormon. Mosiah. Daniel was thrown in a lion's den for his faith. Moses forsook his nobility to suffer with the Hebrews and to lead them to freedom. Abinadi was burned at the stake for his faith. People have been stoned, persecuted, shunned, rejected, and faced all manner of opposition. These people are not just stories. They were really men, as real as me. They lived, and they testified of Christ. No matter what opposition they faced. And I find myself asking, 'How much opposition am I able to take before I finally give up?' Growing up in Utah, it's easy to take the gospel for granted because the church is so very strong. There is opposition, online, sure. Lots of voices around the whole world. But at least I don't have to worry about being thrown in a furnace like Daniel. I realize I have a long ways to go. But I cannot get there on my own. In order to accomplish what I want to do, I'll need to rely upon God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost. With their strength, I can do all things. It will be a long and difficult road to get there. It's not just the flip of a switch. It will take much patience, faith, trust, dedication, and hard work. But with God, nothing is impossible."

I invite you all to read Hebrews 11. If you want examples of what it means to have faith, go read that chapter. I find it very powerful.

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That's all for chapter 5. Don’t be afraid to reach out! I don't respond to emails very often (I'm trying to be better about that), but I promise I read all of them and cherish them.